Daring to Dream: The Relative Feeling of Dreaming

Daring to Dream

Nora Roberts

This might be quite off with what this blog is talking about.

But when you watch movie, it's like reading the story right? If you're an active type of viewer.

Like when you get to read a book, you see a preview of the scenes, in your head. And that is I think another interesting thing to do. Especially if you're a voracious reader, you get to see landscapes even if you're just facing a plain wall in front f you. You see a castle with people dancing in a circle and series of dances, even if you're just sitting with your blanket on your knees, your head on the wall next to your bed and your pillows beside you, a hot coffee that smells so good feels so good, a dim light beside you and the moonlight above you is just so perfect.

You can always go back to the time when the book was written, when the story has taken place. It always is a joy that when I read, I get a piece of me to it, I relate the stories into my own experiences and that's how I get to the thought that I better get going because there is another source of knowledge and experience from a book that talks about dreaming and taking risks.

"You don't have to be great to start, you have to start to be great." -Zig Ziglar.
This quote I think relates much to what this book is telling me.

ONCE UPON A TIME WHEN I FOUND THIS BOOK...

***

I always stop by to where books are sold in the cheapest price possible, I find satisfaction when I see pile of books written by world's most courageous authors. Then I saw this "Nora Roberts," the author of "Purity in Death," I stopped looking at the other book and ran onto it like I really need to grab it already. It says, "Daring to Dream."

It was covered with a celluloid, the edges of the book turning brown already, I looked inside it, sniffed it, I knew then it was already old. I traced the pages one by one, I was in the moment of constancy where I felt the need to buy the book. All other writings of Nora Roberts were there, it also gave a preview of "Holding the Dream" with the phrases coming January 1997.

I didn't know when this book was published but I know I haven't come into senses when book 1 was published. It's just amazing how you feel the era of a book written before you were born, written by a person who's just so brilliant. By the way, her book, writing as J.D. Robb, Purity in Death, was a totally different one, thinking maybe this one just writes thriller in mystery stories before. But she's got a girl story I must read.

***

Now, let me tell you a brief story why I loved this book.

The breathtaking scenes in the lives of Concannon sisters, "modern women of ambition and talent who embody the timeless spirit and beauty of their land on Ireland's rugged west coast."

It focused on the story of Margo Sullivan, daughter of the Templeton family's stern Irish housekeeper. She was ashamed of that as she grew, she was treated like one of the kids of the famous Templetons. There's three of them in the mansion, Margo (the dreamer), Kate (the clever one), and Laura (the real daughter).

They were treated with all the pleasures of life, while Josh Templeton continue to be rude with Margo, as they grew up, he felt the desire to be with her.

But as Margo turned 18, she went away, to chase her dream, left her "could be princess like life" in the mansion, left her mom who was trying hard to convince her not to go. But then she experienced the normal adolescents' desire, to be someone, to live her dreams as early as 18. She became a model, in Milan and other parts of the world. She had what she wanted. But when she encountered that scandal with her business colleague, she was all broke and was treated so hard by all the people who loved her before. That sucks as a person who tried to go all the way to living her one dream and it was taken from her all of a sudden. This tragedy almost broke her, she was looked upon as a broke woman, disrespected her, and treated her as unimportant in her society, she was, disregarded.

***

As I read this, I related to how she thinks, I was as well 18 when I was reading this book. One year ago, I could not still forget the scent of the book, the scent of Margo, the hotel rooms of the Templetons, when Margo and Josh made love and talked about their business and how it goes, trying to figure out what it might be like if they live in their own castle together. But because Margo was busy cleaning her name and Josh waiting for her to admit that she likes him too, he helped him in any circumstance.

Margo had a home to run to when she was lost. She was welcomed, warmly by her 'sisters' and her family at the Templeton house. Her dream never changed still, her bitch attitude might have caused her breakdown but it was the reason she still stood up. She built this business where she sold every piece she has taken from her life back in Milan, the world of passion and fashion she left out there was carried through her.

Like a young lady who want to live like a princess, like me, the attitude is the foundation to where one could start to be liked by anyone who sees her because every girl wants to be treated like a superwoman, dressed like everyday she face the spotlight, or talk as if she's never gone through circumstances that humiliated her.

But I never regret those feelings I felt when I was bullied, I was treated as if I was so stupid. I thought, maybe they just can't understand the world I'm living or the dream I'm chasing I don't know but I think insecurity runs in every blood of a woman, specially so if she was raised in a society that is built by beauty and stardom.

My dream is to be an actress, singer-songwriter, a poet or a novel writer and sometimes I could not arrange these thoughts in my mind, I think in a very lose way, light-headed they say with a piece that is artsy. I love it when people smile back at me as I sing to them, when their eyes sparkling even without saying. younger kids are like this, the little girls who's looking and listening to me, they are good foundation whenever I want to pursue the dream.

Anything that's related to literature or art, a person who makes pieces of art are inspiration to me. I'm dreaming of that day when people will be singing and dancing to all the words to my song.

Like Margo, I know there's gonna be no place that feels home rather than home. Nothing feels intimate than kissing your lover and supporting you, understanding your ways and your playful mind.

The ambitions of a young lady lives forever in her heart until she will not have this in her arms. The mission to fulfill it, daring to dream, chasing the dream and holding on the fulfillment of the dream, with one leg stepped back and one leg on high grounds, the balanced and humble ways will always be the forces that will put you on top. The ambition is there, now, taking the first step is another triumph to achieve.

In the book, Margo ran to chase her dreams but she was pulled back by tragedies and finally finding herself when she returned home. That she should've waited until her dream was ripened and she's ready to chase it down the road already.

Waiting is worth it. Failing to prepare is preparing to be failed. You wait as you prepare and it will all be worth it. If you weren't able to achieve your dream at first, do it again. What's worth doing is worth overdoing as I recall from Steven Tyler quotes :)

The lesson here is, you should first know what you want, how to get it right, how to get it all done, then go for it.

Dreaming starts in head, then if the body wants to get it started, think again, are you really prepared for it mentally, physically, by heart and by soul? If not, don't do it, but if you are, go!

As Paulo Coelho said, "There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: fear of failure." Never fear, conquer it, focus on your goal, kick it like a ball in the soccer field. 

Furthermore, he believes that, "People are capable, at any time of their lives, of doing what they dream of." DREAM NOW PEOPLE, YOUNGSTERS!

There's no age considered for excuses when or how you will chase your dream, as long as you will hold it, as long as it brings you close to a life you ever imagined, then you're doing it right.

I'm amazed I'm taking all these thoughts in my head and it enlightens me. I could build my empire as long as I want it, but reaching my destination will take time, and I'm willing to wait because I believe I will be able to bring myself there.

"You don't become what you want, you become what you believe" -Oprah Winfrey. 

If you believe that you can do it, you will definitely become like it. Not because you want, you'll get, work for it then enjoy it. That's the essence of dreaming, work for it, build it, earn it, then live it.

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Just a short ad from me, you could read some of my poems and stories in my Wattpad account, "megterrific" and my wordpress.com account, that's "meaganotorious" and my google account, just search "jesellemangoma@gmail.com." You could view some of my videos in Youtube too. Thank you!

Source of Urge to BEGIN AGAIN

"Begin Again"

This is the reason why “Lost Stars” by Keira Knightley became my soundtrack in my lone time.

4:00 pm could be my favorite time of the day, when the sun shines still but is beginning to sink in the west coast.the color of my hair turns to orange, my skin soaked in the cool strike of sun on my cheeks, it makes my lips more moisturized and I feel alive at this time of the day.

But what makes me more alive is at the time of the night, when it's 11 pm or 12 am, while listening to that cool and melodious voice of Keira. It's like she's bringing me back to the moment where the song plays in my head and the stars sparkling as I see 'em from my room's east part window. I would talk to this single star that seems to be the biggest, the brightest, the one which also talks to me, saying "yes" to everything I ask and listening to everything I say.

"Who are we? Just a speck of dust within the galaxy." The lyrics of the song goes like that, and like me, the star is just like a dust in the galaxy, but it is a part of the whole of it. I'm a part of this world, a part of the whole of something, the whole of my family, my circle of friends. One by one, each night, I think of how could I make every opportunity a ground for me to grow and feel satisfied with anything I have, especially now that I'm still 19, people say there's a lot more to run the long way, and I have to stop on every street down the road. A stop where I could gather something new, learn something different, meet someone new who's gonna have a say on what you can do.

This movie starring Keira Knightley as 'Greta', Adam Levine s 'Dave,' Mark Ruffalo as 'Dan,' Hailee Steinfield as 'Violet,' and Catherine Keener as 'Miriam.' Greta and Dave are songwriting partners and  lovers. Dave signed a record deal from a record label based in New York and he got involved with the anothe rgirl who is also from the studio.

While Dan and Miriam were divorced and is currently sharing the custody for their daughter, Violet. He's a totally wide father who lives his life like an asshole lately because of losing his position as executive producer of a record label.

Dan saw Greta playing in a bar, a song that she composed called 'You Can't Take Back." She's so down after her breakup with Dave. Now, her friend who's living in New York, 'Steve' played by James Corden, helped her out, invited her to his place and they have shared things about music and their life situations.

Dan gave Greta his calling card hat night Steve took her to the bar where he's also playing every night.

Then, for a long convincing time, Greta said yes to Dan about him offering a deal and endorsing her to the company where he worked back then. At first, the endorsement didn't pass so they recorded an album produced by Dan, Greta, and Steve.They recorded under the bridge, streets, in the boats, at the top of a building, int a narrow space between two big apartments.

They innovated a new style of recording songs, they introduced the ideal characteristics of the determined individuals.

Now, back to dreaming, I was wondering when my songs will be played in the stereos and phones of the people, see them sing to my songs, sign albums, (other option is  sign books I've written) LOL. I am very much into literature and music, the sense of art that it transmits is very virtual to me. The feeling of bleeding and writing, the feeling of re-inventing a story, re-telling a story in rhythmic melodies, or these are the two of the world's timeless ideas of humans, timeless form of expression of feelings and questions, about the world and people.

Being one of them is my dream, their stars maybe my stars, their journey might be like mine.

The idea of recording songs everywhere as long as you want to happen what you want to happen was a very fine proposition from the movie.

It is very empowering, to me, I was again motivated in the career I want.

Not forgetting to tell you, I watched this movie last summer, while I was in Baguio for my OJT. I repeat watching them each time I want to remember my source of urge again.

They gave me so much fire for my passion to light again and live on fire. The movie transmitted an energy to my heart, it left me the lesson that there's this great source of power that you can have, right now, it's the emotion that some people cannot or can never feel. I'm even lucky I have that in me and always will be. It's a gift that can take you to the best future you could imagine.

The love of family, friends, partner or lover can never be changed, the opportunities still coming and blessings are just there, ready to be with to us when the time comes.They are reunited with their loved ones, through music and brilliance.

That is the people who support you make your life better, makes you a better human.

There's this content in my heart I cannot sing in this blog post, but watching this, I never regretted.

I am thinking about it again, I want to see Keira was the "Anna Karenina," a classic actress and artist she is.

It takes girls to understand other girls, and men to understand what these girls are not aware of.

You might consider watching this over a coffee, or a musician :)

P.S. Bye for now. Watch out for my "Ride Along" movie. Another motivation source!

Picture of Me

"The Intern"

I can't remember where I copied this movie. But all I know is, the first time I saw it, how the characters act, I knew it will be another favorite movie of mine.

Because their interests are my interests too. Working, advertisements, clothing, focused and sometimes ignoring small details of what could probably make life better and not just... working. 

Remember that "Stuck in Love" movie I was telling about lately?  It talked about books, writing and now, this one talks about creativity, in a very professional way.

This is a Nancy Meyers Film, starring Anne Hathaway as 'Jules' and Robert De Niro as 'Ben'. This film is a story about passion and happiness that one gains from it (passion). You gain happiness and satisfaction. Like, the stress is just a dust in the wind that you can easily put off from your eyes through the work of your hands.

I remember reading about that "Dear John" book of Nicholas Sparks last night, in page 71, it said, "Happiness is infectious" and "Passion and Happiness work hand in hand." I agree.

That time, I thought about this movie, I recalled how Jules would be working overtime, everyday, without actually feeling fatigue, without a sign of pressure, she faces her daughter and husband in a very professional, yet sweet and motherly way. She's actually living her life!

Then I decided, I wanted to pursue a corporate type of career or anything related to media production. But it takes courage to move your body to start getting to your goals.

"Love and work, work and love" was the first line of De Niro that was mentioned in the movie. Also, Nat Wolff had special appearance, as the interviewer of Ben when he entered as an intern in Nancy's company.

It all started when he read about a print ad on the street saying that a company named "About the Fit" is in need of senior interns, literally senior citizens. He grabbed it, recorded a video on a cam, wearing his tie he carefully selected from a cabinet of ties.

In the interview, he has even set his alarm like an excited pre-schooler, then orientation happened, he was assigned to a table with a macbook, dunno if it's air or pro, and he didn't know how to use it. Of course.

Jules felt upset about Ben being assigned to her as her intern, just because she says she's not good with creating partnership with older people. She's very direct with what she wants. But when she was confronted by her assistant about making things "working out too fast for the employers to cope with," and saying "we can't keep up with our own success."

Also, in terms of time, they had a name for Jules, "Jules' Standard time," she's always one hour late in their meetings. In classes, I'm always late, even meeting somebody, there's this idea that I should not be letting them feel like I'm too excited with what's gonna happen next.

So they looked for an executive who would be teaching her how to slow down and handle business matters as light as possible. And she found this man in New Zealand.

And then, Jules was cheated by her husband, because of working and going home late because of work. But it ended up with all honesty, Jules learned about Ben, that her office was his former office then, that he acted as VP for sales in advertising, and he loved his wife so much when she was alive. Basically, they became part of each others' lives. Ben served as Jules' father and adviser for awhile.

I saw myself in Jules' attitude in the workplace, she never would have stopped or at least slow down if she's not told to. She wants to make things happen very fast, like Lily Collins' attitude in "Stuck in Love." Sometimes, I'm always waiting for whatever's next, not enjoying the moment too much, just the experience.

I learned about the "roll up your sleeves" attitude. When one works, nothing should serve as interruption or destruction. i never would have wanted one jumping into me while I'm working on some serious matters. Highly organized, getting laid sometimes, but is working so fast when the nerves are awake. I'm that kind of girl, and I think, that's the attitude one can have to live a successful life.

Up to the time that Jules' routine of calling her mom would just be a normal part of the day, not special, talking to her about work and hearing some sermons, then not actually doing what she's saying. naughty-responsible, still loving daughter am I right?

Well, she even snores so loud, very disturbing. While in the car, with Ben, she was tired, and she sounded like a rhino, "a classic noisy sleeper". LOL.

Sometimes, mom would just scold me about taking a break from my work or not even eating the whole time. I'm good with it, she doesn't have to worry that much, she could still make me soup or cook noodles with an egg, and ask me to have a coffee, but I don't sip coffee.

This happened while I was working on my thesis, for two nights, 1am to 7am on February 18 and 12-6am on February 19, a Friday, I missed sleeping in my bed. Then went to school with my eyes falling from under my face. And I still wear that matte color lipstick.

Actually, I only do sip coffee when I chill out, at the upper end of our house's stairs, reading a romantic or thriller novel by Nora Roberts, then sleep.

Like Jules, I am a realist, sometimes going fairytale like. But not too fantasizing about being a princess, just, being classy! but I enjoy being funny sometimes. Creates a comfort zone.

Hey, by the way, I'm watching it again. ;) 

P.S. If you're looking for a perfectly successful business woman like attitude, I recommend you watch this :) SAYANARA!

Stuck in Movie "Stuck in Love" (I'm still high)

Stuck in Love

In the late months of 2014, on a December, I saw this movie on YouTube. It's a movie by Nat Wolff, Lily Collins, Logan Lerman, Greg Kinnear, Jennifer Connelly, Kristen Bell, and Liana Liberato. It was literally about being 'stuck' in love. They were all stoned.

I'm going to share how this movie moved me. When I watched this first, I wasn't able to understand what they were smoking, why ye guys behaved like that, then I watched this again as I downloaded the movie in a computer shop. Then I learned that this was an Indie Film. I researched about this movie to understand what it says, more than what it showed.

Late when I realized that what Nat and Lily was smoking at the rooftop are weeds. They were smoking marijuana while talking about realists and hopeless romantics. Lily didn't believe in love, while Nat Wolff, the teenage idealist, believes so that love exists because she's always stuck with staring at the beautiful face of Kate.

Romantics, romantic... Brings me the thought about Taylor Swift's song New Romantics, with the lyrics, "Can you come along with me? Heartbreak is the National Anthem." Yea, I admit, she's a real good lyricist.

Lily is a cynical person, she writes about sex, she's getting her experiences with whoever she wants, discuss all those things about religion to a guy who believes in God so much. That scene was very funny. I encounter such too, when I'm talking about something and they get it differently. Because the others think systematically, like, hello light headed people!

Just want to comment on the stars of this movie, they were all my favorite. I was so glad seeing Greg in "Heaven is for Real," Liana in "The Best of Me," Lily Collins in "Mortal Instruments," Kristen Bell in her "When in Rome," also one of my favorites, Nat Wolff in "Behaving Badly" with Selena Gomez! I'm a movie addict just so you know. :)

And every time I see a Stephen King book, I jump in, like a whining dog or a very happy kid, it's like the movie scenes are coming back to me. And when I surf the internet, teh first time i heard about an online publisher, Scribner.com, yiii I was so excited!

It was a cool movie, to me, it was a very brilliant indie film by Josh Boone. I have searched this director and I think he really is into books, like Paper Towns of John Green. If I'm not mistaken, he took part in it, maybe as a director or something very nice as well. 

What fascinated me about this film is the characters who are writers. The family of Lily as 'Sam' (Nat's sister), Greg (father of Rusty and Sam), Liana as 'Kate' who has a drug problem (Rusty's girlfriend) and Logan Lerman as 'Lue' who was crazily in love with Lily. 

Lily was a novel writer there and pursuing a degree in fiction writing, Lue takes the same thing, she published a book, but when her father learned that she was not publishing the book "Just Saying Hi" to which he has given his expertise in checking book manuscripts, he was upset. George was divorced to his wife and Lily hates her mother because she thought Greg was cheated. But then, at the end, it was all Greg's fault, Sam fell in love with Lue, thought that the love he has for her was true when he stayed there with her, in the car, playing the Elliot Smith's "Between the Bars."

Sam didn't want to get hurt by people. She does not trust them. A bit skeptical.

And Nat as 'Rusty', who loved Kate so much has put her away from drugs and all the vices, she was more expert than him in bed, but she was put in a rehab after what happened in his sister's book release. 'Kate' was too drunk, picked up by a guy she knew because of drugs, they rescued her and was put in a rehab.

Now, the mom and dad thing, Greg and his wife, reunited in a Christmas eve.
Moreover, I liked the musical scoring, it matched the emotions in the scenes and the people in it, the situation being showed.

I heard the names of Stephen King and Bob Dylan in the movie and they were great writers. 

I wish I could read Stephen King's novel about John F. Kennedy's assassination too. I saw this book went on sale in SM Baguio but I was unable to get it because I bought Nora Roberts' first.

Praise to Josh Boone for this film, it mirrored the life that teenagers are living, the dramas in a family, the love that grows in time. I have learned a lot, this is my first favorite movie.

This also inspired me to write more on my blog, share my experiences to everyone, update my journal everyday, create websites that talk about love, fashion, gangsters, life, realizations, passion, interests, etc.

"It take experience to be a good writer." So I went out to get some of mine. All the different things a young lady would have done, because I think I've been missing a lot. One escape is music, I also did skipping schedules, testing my brain if it could go with the flow, watched bands play, write lyrics from time to time just so I stay creative.

I could possibly write about a thriller, romantic series, my life, my journey, the people who I spend time with.

And as I watch this movie, I smile, like every scene is new to me. Because this movie for me is timeless. I have let the closest people to me watch this. Shaira, my best girl buddy watched this and she said she liked it. The characters made it so good, Carlo, my suitor then, now my boyfriend, said he likes it very much too.

 So I thought, maybe I was right. That this movie is really really worth watching over and over again!

"I remember that it hurt, looking t her hurt." 

This is Rusty's line while looking at 'Kate' sleeping in their literature class. Gosh I love literature, maybe one day I'll pursue this :) And when one guy would look at me like that, the music just plays in my head like I too am is in the scene.

Alliteration, hyperbole, simile, prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction, novels, films. These are my pleasure. I loved our literature classes with two of the most creative teachers, sir Jan Rich Guira and Mark Fernandez. They pushed me to write more, and analyze literary pieces, deconstruction, reader-response, beyond the world criticism, realist. Also, I loved philosophy, associate my attitude to a stoic, cynical person. I didn't believe in love too until I was struck by the misery of this talented and sensible person. In short, he's not boring because he can talk to me about anything.

This has let me grow, independently. Just looking back and now, I'm ready to push a writing career whether in fiction or non-fiction, be involved in a production or act in it.

I'm stuck watching this movie and I'm stuck thinking of growing, independently.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H63f7g7ETRI (click this if you want to watch)